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Showing posts from May, 2012

like eating leftovers edition - TMI Tuesday

TMI Tuesday for 5-29-2012
1. If your lover was turned on by forced feminization would you participate (giving or receiving)?
I'd not be a good candidate myself for feminization, it would be pretty laughable IMHO.  I am what I am, and that's not feminine, I don't think there's a force in the world going to change that . . .  With that said, if Serafina wished to practice forced  feminization upon another male, I'd gladly be a willing collaborator, as I think it would be exciting as a dominant to take control of another individual to the point of enforcing a gender identity.

2. When you have sexual dreams or fantasies that are aggressive or cruel, does it worry you?
When I was young it worried me a lot.  It was always easier for me to write stories from the perspective of submission, as it would seem to be the more compelling and relate-able role for a main character, and I think at least in part, that was due to guilt I felt about being a dominant and a sexual sadist.…

jump in, the water's nice . . .

I'd like to endeavor to live the rest of my life without regrets . . .

In the world of BDSM, as with many things in life, the most important step is actually the first . . .
Don't wait for tomorrow  . . .

Do it today!

IML2012 - picking up a Dungeon Bed

It's no secret that Serafina and I recently invested in a beautiful piece of BDSM furniture, the Dore Alley bed from DungeonBeds.  The bed's been a dream of mine for quite a while, so when I discovered DungeonBeds.com offering a significant discount for the bed that would be displayed at IML2012 in Chicago, we found a way to make the purchase happen.  The bed was available for pick-up from the DungeonBeds display at the IML Marketplace at the event's end late Monday afternoon, so we spent our Memorial Day in a very unique fashion.

Also making the day unique was our company, as we were joined by another local couple who live a M/s lifestyle.  We very much enjoyed their company.  Although this was just the second time we've ever managed to meet up in person, conversation rolled along as if we'd been lifelong friends, making the entire day a little richer for their presence.
And, at the end of the day, we couldn't have brought the bed into our home without their h…

Now you bring her back to us . . .

Serafina and I had a lovely surprise waiting for us this morning from our dear friend Becca, a wonderful short story to be shared with our readers!  I don't know that there's anything more to say, other than that we hope you enjoy Becca's story as muc as we did . . . A Journey of Firsts (could be more parts?) by Becca



It was my first, scratch that, our first night in New York City. He had been many times, but this was my first time in this amazing place. It was going to be a night of firsts. The time had come, and that was that. I was excited and nervous and the jazz bar, full of hipsters of all ages, seemed perfect. We walked in, His warm large hand on the exposed part of my lower back, immediately calming me and making me warm all over. And wet, so wet already. I looked around at all the attractive, well dressed people in pockets of conversation in the softly lit, cozy ambiance of the club. We wandered over to the bar.
"I'll have a scotch, the Laphroaig …

Going Somewhere?

We're off to IML2012 to pick up our dungeon bed and peruse perverted play-tool purveyors.

So, do you have any exciting travel plans for Memorial Day weekend?

True Love

Some days are just a bit more mellow than others.  I was cruising my Facebook Page today and came across a very sweet pic that was being passed around so I just had to share it with our readers, seeing in general BDSMers are perceived as strange, odd or perverted. . we are!

life's soundtrack . . .

just a poignant lyric fragment from a heartfelt performance of an exceptional composition . . .
 it took me took me 20 years just to find myself a pen
for to write down all the words
just to scratch them out again
oh I could use another 20 years
just to fix the last 15
EDIT - I had to add another . . . He's really that good!

about this morning

My darling slave/wife wrote this morning about seeing a glance of disapproval as I left the house earlier today.  I'd be the first to admit it was there, but not for the reason she might have thought . . .   My darling Serafina,

I hope that by now you realize I wasn't upset with you earlier today.  I was simply "off put" for a moment, and, rather than being mad at you, I was upset with myself for having failed to give better instructions.

I do cherish our normal rituals in the morning, the goodbye kiss as I go out the door, the wave I get from you as I put the car in drive.  I should simply have asked you to delay hopping in the tub for 5 minutes until our ritual was complete.  There was plenty of hot water available to make up for the minor cooling the tub would experience in that time . . .  

I failed to think ahead to realize that giving you permission to hop in the tub immediately, I was depriving myself of the joy of our normal rituals.  That is always a sacri…

Servitude

Kinda like attitude with a servant's heart.

This morning it feels like I have seriously offended Master. I feel a void as well.

Almost without ever missing a beat I enjoy attending to Master as he is getting ready to get to work at the office. I get him his drink, ensure that we take our allergenic meds, make breakfast, and run his bath.



Quite often as he is having his bath I may just stand, or sit near him and we chat. Often there is a bit of fussing with the laundry. (The bath area and laundry area occupy the same area.)

Today was no exception. Some days there is plenty of hot water. Many days it is only acceptable. We have had many discussions with this hot-water heater. It does whatever it wants anyway!

Today was a really bracing warmth offering. We have been putting in laminate flooring for our bedroom. The first few rows are hell. But, it does get easier. Last evening we had made significant progress, but in return we got really sore. So sore and tired that I di…

feeling yuck again . . . still muddlin' thru somehow

It's a bad season for asthma here, leaving me wiped out something terrible, and having to resort to medicine I haven't used in years.

I shook the bronchitis that was bothering me earlier in the month, but my asthma has flared up and is leaving me with no energy to write or, do much besides my absolute necessities . . .

In theory reality I have more than just asthma, I really also have emphysema in one lobe of my lungs.  I usually manage my lung health well enough that my own doctor of more than a decade has forgotten I have emphysema, requiring me to remind him once a year ot two ago, necessitating a look back thru the charts to a MRI from 2000.

It's not something I like to discuss or admit, and it is a legacy of smoking cigarettes for part of the 1980's and all of the '90's.  It was a stupid disgusting habit, and I have no one to blame but myself for the fact that I have the disease.

I suppose one reason I hesitate to discuss emphysema more openly, is the fact…

Tough Descisions

The toughest decision I ever had to make was around mother's day or Easter when my X had enlisted my children after a number of seasons of undermining me with our kids; I was given an ultimatum and I was told to choose between them and Master Samadhi.


At first I thought my only option was to to stay, but then I knew my existence would empty and void. I realized that to live the rest of my life that way was not what I wanted. So I asked Master for another chance with him, and he replied he would wait for as long as I needed to come and be with him.


Well the rest is history as they say and even with all kinds of tumult going on around us we became us today. I am convinced I made the correct choice.

IML 2012 Vendor List

Serafina and I are planning to make a quick road trip to Chicago sometime this upcoming weekend to check out the vendors at IML 2012.  Here's a listing (with associated links) of the different exhibitors to be found at IML2012 . . . 


Acme Toy Company - Evanston, IL www.theacmetoycompany.com
Adonis Leathercrafters  -  Indian Rock Beach, FL www.adonisleathercrafters.com
ALT.KILT  -  Madison, WI www.altkilt.com
Andre Whips by Ms. V  -  Quebec City, Quebec www.ms-v.ca
Aneros  -  Houston, TX www.aneros.com
Balls and Chains  -  Los Angeles, CA www.ballsandchains.com
BDG Sales  -  Tamaqua, PA www.bdgsales.com
Bear Ink  -  Augusta, GA
Bear Skin Rug-ged  -  Safety Harbor , FL
Beargearusa.com  -  Indianapolis, IN www.beargearusa.com
Beartshirts.com  -  Indianapolis, IN www.beartshirts.com
Bernie's big bags  -  Highland Park, IL www.berniesbigbags.com
Bijou  -  Chicago, IL www.bijouworld.com
Bootleg Life  -  Berwyn, IL
Bootwerks  -  Fort Lauderdale, FL www.bootwerks.com
Boy Butter  - …

keeping her quiet - cleanliness is next to godliness edition

Dirty Mouth?
I said a bad word once, and I actually did get my mouth washed out with soap. 
    ~ Ashlee Simpson
Keeping Her Quiet (pt. 11) - Soap Gag Welcome to yet another installment in an ongoing series of posts about gags and gagging in BDSM.  Other postings in this series (so far) include: Keeping Her Quiet (pt. 1) - Duct Tape GagsKeeping Her Quiet (pt. 2) - Introduction to GagsKeeping Her Quiet (pt. 3) - Variations on a GagKeeping Her Quiet (pt. 4) - Wiffle GagKeeping Her Quiet (pt. 5) - Serafina's AssignmentKeeping Her Quiet (pt. 6) - Hand GagKeeping Her Quiet (pt. 7) - Drooling!Keeping Her Quiet (pt. 8) - Gag Maker ExtraordinaireKeeping Her Quiet (pt. 9) - Panty GagsKeeping Her Quiet (pt. 10) - Fetish GagsKeeping Her Quiet (pt. 11) - Soap Gag I'd like to take a moment to remind my readers that the series title is not intended to be chauvinistic of sexist.   Instead, it's entirely a reflection of my 30 years of experience exploring BDSM as a heterosexual dominant.

You …

boobs a lot

Earlier this week I posted a paean to natural breasts, which was generally well received (notwithstanding a pair of surgical alteration advocates who somehow tried to turn my personal preference into a statement about society's ill will towards all women who don't look like a fashion model) - that is except for the part where I forgot to mention mouse traps (if you have to ask you haven't been reading comments) . . .

Now, everywhere I look, I see breasts!!!  I don't know if I was catching on to some kind of trend with my subconscious, or if there's just something in the air, but it seems that everywhere I look since then, I see boobs!  It turns out, they are everywhere!

First I was written by my dear friend Cherub, who thanked me for the post, saying it was a nice consolation for the constant looks her own chest seems to attract.  Since I don't have a cast of characters kind of post describing my current (or past) relationship status with the individuals I men…

stalker (deux)

Returning to my frightening tale of spectres and returns from the grave . . .

The story of Serafina's and my wedding, our non-honeymoon (caregiver responsibilities precluded our going away together even for a single night) and other related activities deserve their own postings, which I'll get to as time and inspiration allow.  Simply said, it was a beautiful and wonderful day, perhaps the best day of my life, if only because it cemented my relationship with Serafina.  It allowed us to get on with the pesky process of immigration, and it made legal what had been in our hearts from almost the first . . .

The important thing to tell you, my dear reader, for the development of this particular tale, is that exactly one week to the day after we were married, I got a fateful message on Facebook . . .

The note wasn't from a familiar name, at least it didn't seem to be so at first glance.  I nearly deleted the message without thought.  Then, just as I was about to trash it, I …

we are the world (to some)

A good friend of mine who just had a baby arrive a few days ago was talking with me about watching his newborn dream the other day.  His one great conclusion?  That his son must be dreaming about breasts!

My friend's observation surprised me a little, as he's not sexist and he's rarely heard discussing anything even remotely sexual.  But his logic was seemingly inescapable, he simply reasoned that breasts were a week old baby's entire world.  At an older age it's likely that a newborn would have other dreams, their world having enlarged to include brightly colored mobile objects dancing above their cribs and a world of other sights and sensations.  But, at a week of age or less, boobies are all they've got!

I suppose there's little wonder that some of us never outgrow our fixation with breasts, they are marvelous and beautiful objects worthy of desire and obsession.  With all of that said, it's my opinion that far too many cosmetic surgeries are done t…

Thank You! (and a close call)

I'd like to thank everyone who commented with well wishes in response to my recent post about not feeling the best.  I'd like to think that your well wishes, kind regards, and healing thoughts and prayers have made a difference, as I am feeling much better today, and can say with certainty that I am on the mend.  Thank you!

Anyone who's suffered from asthma knows that lungs don't just get better overnight, especially when they've been hit by bronchitis.  While it's true that there's still more than a little residual inflammation, I'm breathing much more freely, and I'm no longer running a fever.  With just a little time, and some help from my friend Advair, I'll be back to normal.

I'm usually very good at managing my own health.  In theory, I have Emphysema in one lobe of my lungs, but my own Doctor of 15+ years even tends to forget that fact.  It's a legacy of smoking cigarettes, but that's far in my past, I've not had a drag or…

feeling blech!

Please excuse the sparceness of recent postings . . .

We worked hard on home improvements over the weekend, starting the room remodel necessary to feature our Dore Alley bed in a proper setting to do it justice . . .

Unfortunately, I worked hard enough to make myself sick . . .

Because I have pretty severe asthma, I've always been prone to catching bronchitis, and today's no different.  My biggest allergy problems stem from house dust and mold, just the kind of things that tearing up old carpet will stir up and put into the air . . .

I felt progressively worse each day over the weekend, and worse still yesterday.  Simple asthma attacks, wen ignored, almost always progress to some kind of infection.  I'm running a fever and my lungs were bad enough yesterday that I required a nebulizer treatement . . .

With a deadline for the arrival of our new bed hanging over our heads, I can say with absolute certainty that this couldn't have come on at a worse time . . .

Pleas…

stalker . . .

Come close my dear reader, gather around the campfire, as I tell the haunting story of a spectre who returned from the dead to crash my wedding . . .

I'm not screwing around here either, this is no mere invented horror story, I'm deadly serious.  With Serafina as my witness, I proclaim that the events I'm about to recount did truly occur in the State of Illinois and Township of M*****, on the 23rd day in the month of July, the 2010th Year of Our Lord.

My tale actually begins much earlier, all the way back in 1978, at a small private school, where a pair of social outcasts befriended each other, eventually becoming intimate.  She'd tell you that I was her first lover, and I'd have to admit that she was my first love.  We dated for two years, attending Homecoming and Prom as a couple while underclassmen.

Standing almost equal to my 6' height, she was a tall girl, with a particularly strong oval shape to her face.  She was called "Balloon Head", a nam…