Sunday, January 8, 2012

My Journey

who am I? I wish I knew that in a way that mere words would suffice to tell adequately.

 I have and still am discovering more and more each day. . . that everything I once thought I knew might not be as I'd perceived. 

Reality is born into and dies in each individual mind. . .and every one's perception of reality is only in their mind, even if that person adheres to anther's reality - supposing that he has inherited it by will and choice.

Some people refuse to make their own choices and are never able to become responsible to themselves, and those masses adhere religiously and tenaciously to very entrenched concepts, which become the boundaries of existence, and their need for security is so great that they dare not question boundaries that exist only in their mind, of course, because if indeed they are moved, it upsets their entire paradigm.

Testing boundaries however has lead me on a very fascinating journey.  Some parts of this journey can be extraordinarily difficult and confusing.  I earnestly seek to avoid those parts, wanting to embrace only the enjoyable and wonderful experiences. 

But unless the wonderful is tested,  . . then it is a rental agreement, rather than the ownership contract.  And so I am compelled to stretch the borders of understanding.  The amazing thing is how much more there is than what what I think - than  all the stuff I know.

So much more!  Sometimes The Creator closes a door but then there is an open window. . . maybe a new opportunity, . . and hopefully healing and solace. Michael is my tower of strength. I am deeply committed to him, Thank-you Michael.

I am the author of many photos here at Spiritual BDSM.  I have long been a rather casual, free-lance Photographer. In High School I had the privilege of playing in a black and white darkroom, and was known as the school photo techie.  I enjoyed every aspect from winding cartridges to reload them from bulk film to processing to the most fun part of printing and manual manipulation.

My work was printed in the annual yearbooks and local weeklies and whenever I cared to enter some teen mags I quite often placed.   But, because I married early   to escape a bitter living situation from my parent's home and settled into fulfilling domestic lifestyle that was not conducive to continue or to promote further adventures in photo arts for over 20 years.

I met a lady who became a close friend and mentor and encouraged me to re-open the creative doors that had been closed tight for so long and I joined the Abbotsford Photo Arts Association for 6 years until my friend moved to the Island. 

Because of lack of stimulus and life getting in the way  . . it got pushed aside again.  I didn't lose interest. . .I lost momentum. . .and by the time I returned now. . .the darkrooms had all but vanished and digital was still in early and somewhat unpredictable form. . . so I continued to dabble here and there

While with the APAA we had bi monthly competitions and I frequently earn a coveted place and we also had a number of member arranged excursions and invited "famous" professionals who would share their skills. Even with the encouragement of one of those telling me  that I had exceptional eye, I never acquired the where-with-all to procure professional level equipment, so my goal was to use the equipment I do have to the fullest potential. 

I have had a number of opportunities to use my skills for several conventional weddings and once I was invited to photograph a very Traditional First Nations wedding ceremony, with the attendees in full traditional regalia.

Today I continue to capture and and strive to personally be the best I can become.  I guess in the end that's all we can be.  As an artist, photography is a medium and tool, among canvas, paint, and brushes.  With those tools I try and capture something that inspires and motivates others to find beauty and form in the ashes of life.

The camera is a Cool-pix pro 80 we picked up as an interim camera in lieu of the D-300 or maybe??? we are not quite decided, but we have Nikon 135mm bodies and lenses that we are trying to go digital with.  This little camera has done so well that we are wondering if there is any rush at all. After a lot of thought we did purchase a Nikon7000.  It will now be our primary piece of equipment.

I should also probably mention that Master and I are almost always together so we combine our efforts. . .sometimes I see the shot and he takes it. . especially ones like this, because I have a tremor in my hands and even vibration reduction can not always make up for that.

Even if Master and I met originally in an unusual way, it has and is the best thing that ever happened to me.  I have had this adventure now for close to 8 years, and since then Master has shown me that I am truly a submissive,   I am bound to him as a love-slave, and although we may not be perfect, we do live as much as possible 24/7.

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